Sister Sharon Roach

This message is for the silent and forsaken of our society. For those of you who for whatever reason have not been able to find love in life, have a relationship or experience marriage. It’s personal. It hurts. It’s a reality for way too many women in our world today. I’ve been through it and more than likely if you are a woman you have too. People like to pretend this doesn’t exist but it does. This only applies to those women who desired to have a relationship and marriage in their life with a man. Some women have grown accustomed to being alone and are okay with it.

They say that God has someone for all of us and that if we keep searching we will find this special person. Yet, days turn to months and before you know it years have gone by, the youthful flower has faded and still that person has not materialized. It’s no fun watching others fall in love and have wonderful relationships while you continue to wait and search for yours.

I’ve watched women grow old and die having never known what love is. Growing up it was painful to see aunts, cousins and friends who desired to one day get married never have the opportunity to even have a relationship of any kind. Then you have those who had a relationship at one time in their life but never have been able to experience one again. For whatever reason the relationship didn’t work out and they never had a second chance at love. From the Congo to the Appalachian Mountains lonely forsaken hearts cry out to the universe and the universe cries with them. What is wrong with me? What cruel punishment is this?

Society will lead you to believe that there is something wrong with you and all you have to do is plaster, chisel and stitch yourself into the superficial idealized fad of the day and you will find a man. The world will tell you that your standards are too high you need to lower the bar or that your value system is outdated. Society will point to your being too old, having acne, overweight, wrinkles, thin hair, skinny legs, and skin too light or dark as the culprit. Lies to make you hate and change who you are.

Fault is in the world not within the forsaken. Blame societies that uphold all that is ungodly against the sanctity of a woman. The abandonment of the family, ostracizing of the raped, obsession with youth, the hybridization of whorishness and womanhood.  A real woman don’t stand a chance in societies that thrives on promulgating fantasies into reality or one that upholds superstition as fact.

On a much larger scale, the forsaken woman throws God’s natural order of the universe off balance. God intended that every woman should have a man to enjoy the fruits of marriage and family. In fact, the family unit is the foundation of our world without it there can be no order. Woman is the womb and mother of mankind and to be pushed aside and forsaken can only mean destruction. It’s no wonder why our society is falling apart!

It is a blessing to be in a fruitful relationship being able to give and receive love. To have companionship and someone to enjoy the labors of life with. Even the staunchest independent feminist spirit has to admit that deep down inside they desire to have someone special in their life. There is nothing wrong with desiring this and when the opportunity for love comes in your life, you should go for it. Unfortunately, for many this opportunity never presents itself.  

Rejected, alone, disappointed, depressed and staring into an aging future of loneliness is where many women stand today. Truth is, as time goes by things will only get worse for each generation of women due to the continual degradation of our societies. Suffering in silence, many women make their jobs, children, hobbies and church their life. For some this is enough to fill the void. Yet, there is a truth which is salve and healing for the forsaken heart.

Israel once found itself in the position of a forsaken woman, alone, shamed and rejected amongst the nations. God made a promise to Israel, beautiful words of truth that also rings true for the many women today who find themselves alone in life. To all the older women who are alone in the world and all the young women who can’t find that special man, there is a beautiful passage in Isaiah 54 that speaks to the barren one but this scripture can just as easily speak to those today who are forsaken. God has made a commitment to you:

Isaiah 54:4-6.

4"Fear not, for you will not be put to shame; and do not feel humiliated, for you will not be disgraced; But you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. 5"For your husband is your Maker, Whose name is the LORD of hosts; And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, Who is called the God of all the earth.  6"For the LORD has called you, Like a wife forsaken and grieved in spirit, Even like a wife of one's youth when she is rejected," Says your God.…

The promises God made to Israel is true for you today.

Isaiah 49:13 Shout for joy, you heavens; rejoice, you earth; burst into song, you mountains! For the LORD comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.

As you move forward in life accept the blessing that God is your spiritual husband and will be there for you. God cares for you. God is there when no one else is around. God knows the pain in your heart. One day you will transcend this earthly life and the love you didn’t have here on earth will be compensated for with something more substantial than anything this physical life can offer. In the meantime, don’t blame yourself, simply love yourself as you are and don’t forget that God loves you.

You are blessed and highly favored by God.